The 7 Best Comeback Lines from Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes

The success of the Avengers movie brought so much good into the nerd world. We had the promise of much riskier movies being put into production like Dr. Strange and Guardians of the Galaxy. There was a Lego Quinjet and a great Hulk minifig. Joss Whedon was working on an uncancelable S.H.I.E.L.D. show. Also some dumb video game, BUT overall the nerd world looked a lot better post-Avengers. There just was one problem.

At the same time as The Avengers movie came out, Marvel also had an Avengers cartoon called Avengers: Earth’s Mightiest Heroes. And even though it was also about the Avengers, it seemed to be following a different narrative. The characters had different back stories. It took more of its mythology from the comic books than from the movies. And thus, it had to die. Sometime in 2013, Avengers Assemble will take its place and it may be just as good. Who knows? Maybe it will be better. I don’t remember anyone thinking EMH would be the next great nerd cartoon, but it sure was. The stories moved quickly and the characters were serious when seriousness was required, but always also quick with a joke. Out of respect for its untimely demise, let us now take a look back at the fantastic writing of Avengers: EMH and specifically its excellent comebacks.

7. Thor Thinks at Absorbing Man.

So in episode thirteen of season one, entitled Gamma World Part 2, the Mighty Thor seemed to be at the mercy of the Uru powered (and horribly named) Absorbing Man. AM had absorbed Thor’s Mighty Mjolnir giving him possession of all the powers of Thor and he even made his fists into little hammers. “Fight back!” Absorbing Man yelled in between seemingly beating Thor to death. But Thor did not fight back. Thor calmly retorted “I cannot, for I am concentrating.”

It happens just like you expect. Thor controls the Uru Absorbing Man and throws him right back at The Leader and The Leader is very surprised because he didn’t realize Thor controlled the hammer mentally. He probably just assumed Mjolnir, like Cap’s shield, was the world’s most physically inconsistent boomerang. While fans of Thor saw this one coming from a mile away, the specific line was both badass and clever given the present situation. It gracefully illustrated the duality of the way EMH wrote Thor. He is an uber-badass who speaks in girly Shakespearean language, but EMH always managed to make Thor sound great.

This isn’t the first time Thor and AM have fought in a cartoon. In the now ancient Mighty Thor cartoon, Absorbey tried to do the same exact thing but in that instance, Thor just pulled the hammer back explaining “It must always return to me. It is pre ordained.” The EMH line is streets ahead of that nonsense.

P.S. The old cartoon gets even dumber because Absorbing Man then neutralizes the hammer by throwing it into some bricks and Thor doesn’t pull it back that time because…you know…bricks?

Continue reading “The 7 Best Comeback Lines from Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes” >