Backhanded Box Quotes: Pro Hater Edition [Best Of Metacritic]

Welcome back to “Backhanded Box Quotes,” a collection of measured, thoughtful criticism from the user reviews of Metacritic, Amazon and elsewhere. Good luck getting a job with Irrational Games if your game shows up here.

NCAA Football 13

Released: July 10

Critic: guillermop (Metacritic)
• “This game is alpha quality at best this game is trash, am I a EA hater? for sure, they definitely deserve the hate.”

Score: 0.

Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater HD

Released: July 18.

Critic: SkidRowTrash (Metacritic)
• “[The music] is downright offensive to your ears. Absolutely the worst trash I have ever heard with the exception of a few.”

Score: 0.

Critic: AnthonyG (Metacritic)
• “Whenever your skater falls over. The screen flashes a huge bright white light for a few seconds tlll it restarts. This has given me a massive headache and hurt my eyes after only a very short game. It really is that bad.”

Score: 0.

Deadlight

Released: Aug. 1

Critic: Dilop93 (Metacritic)
• “BORIIIING, Microsoft, You owe me 4 hours of my life.”

Score: 0.

Dyad

Released: July 17

Critic: mayhem7 (Metacritic)
• “Don’t get fooled by the media ratings, this game is simply boring. It feels like you don’t have a clue what you are doing and simple button smashing works better than attempting to do it right.”

Score: 0.

Backhanded Box Quotes will be an occasional feature of Kotaku’s Anger Management hour, unless it isn’t.