The Ten Worst Movies Made by 2012's Oscar Nominees

The Oscars allegedly honor the best in the movie business – that’s what they say, anyway, and we’ll go with it for now. But very few people start off great out of the gate; in a business that everybody’s dying to break into and the next paycheck is never a guarantee, most of the industry’s finest make questionable choices at some point. And when they finally hit the pinnacle of their careers, that’s when smartasses like me show up to remind them of said choices. Here are ten that we can’t necessarily blame them for taking money to make, but we can warn you never, ever to subject yourself to them. Besides, Oscars are all anybody’s talking about at the moment, so we might as well have some fun with it.

10. Man of the House, starring Tommy Lee Jones.

Jones, in full-on hardass mode, plays a Texas ranger forced to go undercover as a cheerleading coach in order to protect five witnesses who just happen to be bubble-headed cheerleaders. He is made to move in with them, and hilarity does not ensue. Note to movie producers: If a script contains a gag in which someone shoves his hand up a cow’s asshole, do us all a favor and just don’t make the movie. Even if you are hiring the director of Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure.

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